If We Were Having Coffee #2

I saw a blogger/life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial that I wanted to make it a reoccurring thing!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got water right now because it’s far too late for coffee for me.  I actually wish I was having a jack & ginger right now because it’s been that kind of a week but alas I am not. What are you having?

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m in the middle of Half Bad by Sally Green which I started out loving but have hit a wall with. I don’t know if it’s the crazy of this week or what but it’s kind of causing me to be in a slump. I’m also in the middle of The Sea of Tranquility which is going a bit better. I’d ask you what you were reading.

If we were having coffee... I’d tell you that this week drained me. There was a bit of a family crisis that involved my sister and her two babies (Genevieve and Adela) staying here with Will and I in our one bedroom (things are fine now) and then I found out on Wednesday that I didn’t get the job I interviewed for and was really excited about. I was at my nannying gig when I found out and it took everything not to just break down and cry. I started crying the minute I got in my car. I’m just so frustrated. I KNOW I would have been amazing at that job and I just don’t know why I can’t get a job in my field (marketing/social media). And I feel so stressed because of this long term unemployment. I’ve done everything in my power to find a job and I can’t and I KNOW that jobs just penalize you even more when you are out of work. And all I want to scream is I DID NOT ASK TO BE LAID OFF FROM MY PREVIOUS JOB!!!

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that I need a vacation. I need to go somewhere where I don’t speak the language and explore and eat new foods. My soul needs it…to recharge. To feel even more alive.  I’d ask you about the last trip you went on.

If we were having coffee…. I would tell you how I seriously cannot stop mourning the fact that Breaking Bad is over. Will and I binge watched it in December and I can’t stop thinking it. I feel like no other shows compare for me at this point. I’d ask you if you’ve watched it and if you said no then I’d (lovingly) bully you into it.

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you how this winter is going to be my undoing. I’m NOT a winter girl at all. I hate it. If it weren’t for family I’d be on the first flight out of here to live somewhere warm. This winter has been BRUTAL. In fact, the news keeps telling me it’s the THIRD snowiest winter we’ve ever had. DIE, MOTHER NATURE, DIE. And the fun part? WINTER IS NOT EVEN OVER. Between getting stuck in traffic for 4 hours (should have only been 25 minutes), having below zero temps, my car door being so frozen multiple mornings that I can’t shut it, having to dig out my car, falling on ice and having to drive in shitty conditions…I’M JUST OVER IT.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you how I went to a party for my former bff’s 1 year old kid (to support HER because we’ve been working on things) and I had to see my old group for the first time in over a year. There were only a couple of people who actually acknowledged us/talked to us and the rest of the people literally ignored us. It’s so sad to see friends I’ve had since middle school and high school just act like I’m not there. I had my reasons for leaving that group but this showed me it was the right decision when I thought about how none of them have even tried to reach out/basically showed me how shallow those friendships always were. I was just so disappointed that there wasn’t even hellos or “it’s been so long! How have you been?” from any of them. It give me the major sads. I would also tell you how Will and I went out for burritos and margaritas afterwards and I no longer gave a shit about what transpired.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I slacked off on working out in 2014 so far. I was really dedicated last year and then I started the year off sick and I just have not regained my mojo. SOMEONE PLEASE KICK ME INTO GEAR.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I really want to go to BEA again this year and would be really sad to miss it after having gone every year since I’ve been blogging. It’s more about being able to hang out with people than it is about the books but I really look forward to it. Everything is so up in the air because I don’t know what I’ll be doing job-wise by then and who knows if I’ll be able to get off the time. FINGERS CROSSED IT WILL WORK OUT. I’d ask you if YOU were going and if you didn’t know what it is, because maybe you don’t blog or you are new, I would tell you ALL about it..how it is a bookish heaven.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m really behind in replying to comments on my blog and visiting other blogs. It’s embarrassing honestly. And I feel bad. I don’t know what’s up with me lately HOWEVER..I’m working on it.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I’m honestly having the hardest time keeping my spirits up these days with this whole looking for a job thing. I keep having to look for bright spots in my day — your comments and tweets being one of them — and it’s just really, really hard just not to give up. I’ve never felt so demoralized in my life and I feel like I’m doing the best I can and asking for helping and doing All The Things You Are Supposed To Do and it’s not getting me anywhere. Something’s gotta give eventually, right? Everyone tells me to “keep on going” and I KNOW that’s what I’m supposed to do but I feel like I’m just a hamster on a wheel at this point.

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

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About Jamie

Jamie is a 28 year old married lady who is in denial that she's actually that old. When she's not reading you can find her doing Pilates followed by eating gelato, listening to music with oversized headphones and teaching her niece how to be as awesome as she is.

Comments

  1. If we were having coffee right now I would be fangirling to you all about the Dark Days Tour! (Nashville) And showing you my book journal that everyone signed and probably rehashing the whole event.

    To respond to some of your questions: I’m currently reading Sophie Jordan’s Uninvited. Have you read it? Is it on your TBR? The last vacation I took was a weekend getaway to a cabin in the Smoky Mountains. Oh, how I would love to go back and just have a stack of books and no worries. No, I have not been to BEA, but you could tell me all about it!

    I would commiserate with you about crappy friendships, and not being able to get a job in your field. Although I resorted to taking anything I could find and hate it, so at least you aren’t in a job you hate! And I would tell you how sometimes I just wish my life would slow down because I don’t know that I can handle all the changes, even the good ones.

    I love these posts. ;)

  2. Last year I lost a friend of like 20 years. I really don’t know what happened. At first it was really hard to lose this friend but as time has gone by and I’ve thought about it I realized I just moved on and so did she. High School friends are hard to keep forever. You just change. I guess for me I really didn’t know why she dumped me as a friend? no explanation or anything. But like you I don’t care. It’s been over a year now and I am at peace with it.

  3. If We Were Having Coffee – I’d first give you a super big hug and then tell you to check your email in a few days or even later tomorrow because I need to express my feelings but not out in the open.

  4. Firstly, I freaking ADORE these posts. Okay moving on.

    I’ve been in a bookish slump as well. Because I’ve recently caught a cold, but now that I’m just about all recovered I’m getting back into the swing of things when it comes to reading. I’ve heard such amazing things about The Sea of Tranquility though! I really hope that one works for you. :)

    Arghhhh you not getting that job frustrates me too!! I saw how much you were hoping for it. I know this long term unemployment is hitting you hard Jamie but don’t give up okay? You not getting this job means there’s an even better job totally suited for YOU just waiting around the corner. An even BETTER job than the one you didn’t get. Besides, I’m sure that they are the ones who are missing out, because we all know how what a talented and wonderful person you are. ;)

    I haven’t actually been on a huge trip away for many years but the last place I went to was Russia to see family. Seriously beautiful..especially in Winter…but considering how much you’re sick of the cold not the best place for you to visit at the moment haha.

    TRAIN INSANE OR REMAIN THE SAME! Think of Cassie’s positive attitude kicking you into the mood to work your butt off! (Did that help?)

    I unfortunately live in Australia so BEA is quite hard for me to get to, but I hope to be there one day!

    ALL THE BEST FOR EVERYTHING JAMIE. You’ll get where you need to be in life, don’t you worry. The best job will come sooner than you know it, and it’ll totally have been worth the wait. Just hang in there girl!

  5. If we were having coffee I’d tell you that I feel your pain, with so many of these! With the friends thing, I had to leave a group of friends behind as well and it makes me sad to know that if I saw them in passing I wouldn’t get a ‘hey, how’ve you been?’ even after all the years of friendship we shared.

    And the job situation . . . well, I have a job right now, but it’s not the job I want at all and, to be honest, I’m kind of miserable here. I just don’t feel like I’m putting any of my skills to use or challenging myself in any way and it’s awful. I’ve applied for SO MANY jobs in my field and for some reason I’m just not getting them and I don’t know why because I know I’d be perfect for them. It’s so disheartening. And I just dread another day of going to work at this current job.

  6. I’m currently reading The Distance Between Us by Kasie West and GAH FEEEELSSSS. I don’t know if you’ve read it yet but just I want this ship to sail already!

    *hugs* I know this won’t help so much but I’m definitely sending you happy thoughts <3 I know you would be amazing at any job and I just hope that soon they'll realise that you would be such a valuable member of their team. There was a quote that really stuck with me when I was going through a hard time with friends and stuff, 'Everything will be okay in the end, if it's not okay, it's not the end'. Stay strong Jamie <3

    The last trip I went on was to China and visited my relatives, it's always good to see them :)

    Ooo no I haven't watched Breaking Bad although I've heard amazing things about it! Reason I'm not is because I know there's gore inside and I'm a huge chicken when it comes to scenes like that haha.

    I'll happily exchange seasons with you! It is beginning to get SO DRY here and it hardly ever rains now, I am just not here for the tropical season D;

    Completely understand over the whole former classmates thing, whenever I see people I used to be classmates with and quite close to in school we just ignore each other and it's really sad. I just don't get it but I'm sort of glad I wasn't that close to them because it really wasn't worth it.

    COME ON JAMIE YOU CAN DO IT! I am definitely with you on the working out, I keep saying I'll exercise more but then I stop after a while :x I'm thinking of starting Blogilates because I heard you talk a lot about it so I hope it kicks start the working out into gear.

    I really hope you get to go to BEA! I definitely won't be going haha because of school and living overseas is just no fun when it comes to stuff like this :(

    It's completely alright to feel like crap and just blergh, ride it out and do whatever you want. Then you can come back stronger and more determined :)

  7. If we were having coffee, I’d tell you–GIRL, I FEEL YOU. I’ve been having a heckuva week, and I am ready for it to be OVER (preferably with burritos and margaritas, that sounded really good lol). I feel you on the job search, I’m trying to find a new job to get out of the low-paying and generally shitty job I’m in now, and it’s SO FRUSTRATING. I feel like my resume is the bomb, and that I’m specifically what these jobs are looking for in their job descriptions, but I keep not hearing back, and it’s very discouraging. Hang in there. This week, with everything going on, I’ve kinda been in a reading slump too, and it’s been making me sad all week. Here’s to the weekend! Also, I totally had a group of friends like that, and after a while of being consistently disappointed that they failed to notice I exist–I said to hell with them, and realized I don’t really miss them all that much.

    ANYWHO, the point of this long comment is to let you know I’m always here if you need to talk, vent, whatever :)

  8. I guess I should stop complaining about it being 80+ degrees here, huh? I’m SO not a summer girl, but I live in hot, dry Arizona (Phoenix area) where it’s hot 9 months out of the year. I hate it. Especially when the heat starts early (like in February). Blech! It really is amazing how much the weather affects your mood/productivity/energy levels. Keep your chin up (and consider moving to Arizona) :}

  9. I’ll miss you if you don’t come to BEA! At least come down on Saturday and come to our breakfast.

    If we were having coffee I’d tell you I totally get the friends/former friends thing. So many former friends around, and I always wonder if I made the right choices to pull away from certain people when I did. Especially since this past year two of my best friends moved far away (one is moving back to the general area but will still be 2 hours away.) I wouldn’t say I’m totally lonely because I still have my best best friend here and I have Tom and lots of casual friends, but I miss those connections.

  10. If we were having coffee, I would tell you to hang in there. You are not alone. I’m in a similar situation. I’m in a nanny job right now and looking for jobs and/or hoping I get into grad school. I can’t seem to find a job in my field with only a BA, so it’s difficult. I would tell you that as long as you make plans and don’t lose hope, you will get to where you want to be. The plans you make may not always work out, but eventually something will fall into place.
    If we were having coffee, I would tell you that you are doing great! Being an adult is difficult but somehow the rest of the world got through it, so I think we can too. :)

  11. If we were having coffee, I’d tell you to cut yourself some slack. Sounds like it’s been a crappy week (month? year?) and it is ok to slack off on a few things (like reading and commenting on other blogs) while you deal with the emotional crap. And I’m sorry the job search has been so tough… I was only unemployed for about three months and it was really discouraging and disheartening. Especially getting interviews, having them go well, and having no idea why I didn’t get a job I was so well-suited and excited for. Something will turn up. Having a positive attitude is so important (and so hard). Good luck!

  12. Ok, if we were having coffee I’d pour some alcohol into your cup because it sounds like you could use a bit! And then I’d totally invite you to the beach with me because even though it’s not a crazy trip, it would be far far FAR away from your snowy mess up there! But mostly I’d come across the table and give you the biggest hug, because even though it sounds cliche… I’ve been there and know that what you sometimes need is just a hug.

    If we were having coffee it would be awesome times and laughter and good times because that’s what having coffee with a friend is for, right? I’d tell you about how miracles do happen on the job front, how it’s darkest before the dawn and how hope is hard to hold on to. And then I’d say “Screw this coffee shit. Let’s go dancing!” because God knows that’s what I needed someone to do when I was going through my multiple job front issues.

    Hang in there friend. If we were having coffee I’d tell you how many people love you, respect you and are praying for a job to come your way. :)

  13. (LONG-ASS COMMENT AHEAD)

    *hugs* If we were having coffee, I’d spike yours with some much-needed Kahlua. I’d tell you that I’ve been in the same long-term job-hunting boat and that eventually something will give even if it doesn’t feel like it. Then I’d ask if you want to split a crumb cake or something because sweets always cheer me up.

    I’d tell you that after binging on Richelle Mead’s Vampire Academy series, I’m working on review books again. Right now I’m on UNFORGOTTEN, which is just okay for me. Nothing particularly stands out about it.

    I’d tell you that my last trip was a weekend trip 3 hours north to Orlando for a sorority sister’s bachelorette party. Next week I’m going to Tampa for a “Run or Dye” 5K to visit one of my BFFs.

    If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that OMG I am in the same boat with working out. I was working out 5-6 days a week before the new year, sometimes twice a day. Then I got sick for WEEKS and have had a difficult time curbing my eating habits while not working out. I’m finally getting back into it and have been using My Fitness Pal and texting a few friends to stay accountable, but it’s HARD. Especially because I always want to reward myself with food.

    I’d tell you that I SO hope to see you again at BEA this year and will have a sad if you’re not there, although I’d understand because c’est la vie.

    I’d repeat the chorus and tell you not to give up. Make sure in between all of the blogging, job-hunting, nannying, etc, you’re doing stuff that relaxes you and that you enjoy. Emergency dance parties, meditation, scented candles, cleaning (idk I’m not a neat person, but when I get in that mode cleaning makes me go weirdly zen), WHATEVER WORKS.

    <3 <3 <3

  14. If we were having coffee (or tea) together right now, I would tell you that I have been there before, about nine or so years back. I was out of college and had landed a good job in marketing/advertising. But then I was laid off of my job.

    At this time, I had just recently gotten married. I HAD PLANS. I wanted to start a family. I was supposed to move up and up in my career. What was happiness if I could not have what I wanted and needed? To think, life is so unfair… just by losing one lousy *job*, all of my other dreams – my PLANS – must come to a stand-still! And they did. Come to a stand-still, that is…

    I was depressed with a capital D.

    Over coffee (or tea), I would tell you that, eventually, somehow, my downfall became the greatest thing to ever happen to me. A job offer came around and I took it. I have been at this job for 7 years now and I love it. I have a 6 year old daughter. A home for over 3 years now. All my plans did come back into play. I’d had to wait, but the wait is worth it because I am happy.

    I would tell you that it takes time, but your life and your happiness WILL come back. Keep putting out those feelers on the job front. Be aggressive. It pains me that so much in life hinges on a JOB, but I KNOW you will find the perfect one when the time is right. The difficult times WILL be difficult, but the good times will come back. They will. I believe that only because I was in your place before.

    I would probably end coffee with a croissant or a donut and tell you that you are FAR too talented and good at what you do (your blog is proof of that) NOT to impress an employer eventually. YOU HAVE GOT THIS. In the meantime, spend your days doing what you love with the people you love most. They will keep you grounded and your thoughts in the right place.

    SO much bravery in creating this post, girl. I commend you for letting it all out there.

  15. This is such a sweet idea! To answer your questions:
    Technically I’m reading “Shogun” and “Lirael,” but tendonitis makes it hard to hold a book (it is THE LAMEST THING), so I’ve been reading a lot of graphic novels. Mainly X-Men.
    My last trip was…man, going up to Seattle for family Christmas, I think. We have a rescue dog who doesn’t like traveling or other people very much, so it’s hard to go on proper vacations aside from daytrips. However, this weekend I’m going back to Seattle to visit my BFFs, a trip we were supposed to take a couple weeks ago when we too endured snowfall and hellish driving conditions. (Totally with you on wanting winter to be over. We had our big snowfall, and that was great, but I can’t handle being cooped up again, and I miss sunshine!)
    I haven’t heard of BEA but I like book things!
    And finally I’d tell you to hang in there! You’ll land something!

  16. Love you and these posts! If we were having coffee (which I am right now), I’d tell you that we should totally plan your next vacation and get you on a plane ASAP because holy moly, things sound tough for you! I’d also tell you that spring is just around the corner and I promise things will brighten up soon. Plus, it’s much easier to go on walks and exercise when it’s warmer out… and then that makes you feel better, so it’s kinda a win-win. :)

  17. I know it looks bleak right now, but the perfect job is being prepared for you, it’s just not ready yet. I know it’s frustrating and I know you deserve a wonderful, fulfilling job, but hold out a little longer because I know you’re going to be taken care of! :)

  18. 1) How cute is this! 2) I wish we were having coffee RIGHT NOW. Wahhhhhhhhhhimissyou.

  19. I saw you tweet about not getting the job–I am so sad for you (even though, hi, I have been lurking for ages and don’t think I’ve ever posted here and so I am basically a stranger to you! LOL.) You are way too smart and awesome not to find something. It’s out there! And also, I hope you’re OK with me essentially stealing this idea, because I’ve been thinking I want to find a way to add something more personal to my blog, and this is genius. I love it. <3

  20. If we were having coffee I’d tell you how incredibly sorry I am that things aren’t looking positive for you so far in 2014 and I’d remind you that we all have periods in our lives where we go though major slumps, but they do eventually end.

    I’d also tell you that my husband and I have also been marathoning Breaking Bad – we just started the last season the day before yesterday and I’m so sad it’s almost over (for us). I would then try really hard not to sound like a was name-dropping when I casually mentioned that the woman who plays Marie (Betsy Brandt) was a good friend of mine in college – we were in the theatre program together and since there were only about 10 of us in the Acting program (in our year), we were all pretty close. We don’t keep in touch much anymore (except for the occasional FB message), but it still makes me so happy and proud to see her doing so amazingly on BB and on the Micheal J Fox Show. Totally brings back awesome memories too.

    I’d also tell you that I REALLY want to go to BEA this year, but I’m a little nervous about it since I’ve never done it and I don’t know what to do or expect. I’m hoping I can find someone else who wants to share a room, both so that it doesn’t cost as much money and so that I don’t feel so alone out in the big, scary blogging world! :-) We shall see.

    Here’s hoping that things start looking up for you soon!!

    Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

  21. If We Were Having Coffee … I’d tell you that I got laid off at my last job and it sucked. It was unexpected and I felt so lost and now I’m in a new position and love it so much. I’d tell you that you should hang in there. Job hunting can be so hard, but you’ll find something that’s an even better fit for you!

  22. I am so sorry you had a bad week. Believe me, I know how it feels to be discouraged about the whole process of job hunting. I’ve been out of college for almost a year now and still no luck :( I’m getting so sick of winter, too. It miraculously got up to 60 degrees here yesterday, but I think we’re supposed to be back down in the teens again by next week. THIS WINTER WILL NEVER END! I want spring to come so I can wear shorts and sandals and cute sundresses again! I also really, really want to go to BEA this year. I’ve never been before and I think it would be so cool to celebrate my first year of blogging by attending, but I don’t know what my job situation is going to be like by then. Sigh. Maybe next year.

    Hope you have an awesome weekend that makes up for the bad week!

  23. I know how you feel about losing friends. I was best friends with this girl since elementary school and high school, but over the years we haven’t talked as much. We would talk once in a while and I thought we were good. Then I found out that she got engaged and married last year without even telling me. I was very hurt because I thought we were still close. I guess not since we have gone our separate lives. It’s been a few months since that happened, and while I’m still hurt I’ve come to the realization that she wasn’t such a great friend to me. It’s sad but I guess we all live and learn. Hope your month gets better and you find a job real soon!

  24. If we were having coffee, I would tell you what a wonderful girl I think you are. I would tell you that I don’t understand that they don’t hire you and that it sucks, but that I hope you will get your spirit up again. I would tell you that you must not give up, even when it all feels so negative and shit, because one day someone will realize how great you are and they will give you the perfect job :) I would hug you for the family problems and then I would buy you a nice chocolate muffin to go along with your coffee, because chocolate always makes things a little better!

    And if I were to talk about myself, I would share that I’m incredibly stressed out when it comes to school. I have a great time with my minor, but the fact that I must look for 3 internships is freaking me out.. One already sounds hard enough, especially now a days, so it’s frightening me. I would share that I’m afraid I won’t find anything or that I’m turned down – and I really want to find those spots and show myself that the future isn’t too scary.

  25. I love that you do this. I do love that we also iMessage now so that I can update you on life that way. If we were having coffee, I’d lend you an ear and then I’d complain about how I have a handful of friends who are so “me, me, me” that it’s getting exhausting and I’m not sure I can do it much longer. I’d tell you I understand your job woes. While I have a job, I am looking for something that interests me..more. I do understand how lucky I am to have a job, but how somedays I’m so exhausted from keeping my shit together. But I would tell you that you’ll be okay, because I have faith in you. I would tell you I’m losing faith in myself. I want to delete/deactive my twitter because does anyone care what I have to say? And I’m not even trying to be melodramatic. It is what it is. Should I start a new one? Should I have faith in myself more?

  26. I say that this is a great post and it’s very honest and sweet and we have all been where you are and it’s okay. It’s okay to feel this way and you should remember that it won’t last forever and you WILL find another job. My mother in law always tells me – What is for you, won’t go past you. Through a series of events and luck, some very helpful people, I got my first, second and third jobs. My latest one, it took me almost two years to find, with a lot of close calls. And in the end, I’m glad I found that job at that time, because it was right. It will happen. But I totally understand that when you’re in the middle of it, when you can’t see the end, it’s very frustrating. I will tell you to keep going, but I will also tell you to try something different. Even if it’s small. Take some language books out of the library. Or pick up an old forgotten hobby. Sometimes small steps in other directions will help you relax and de-stress.

    I say I love the Sea of Tranquility. I’m currently reading Dark Triumph, after having devoured Grave Mercy.
    I say I last went to Paris last year to celebrate my ten year anniversary. It was everything I hoped it would be. I did a lot of research before I went and learned a bit of French (which is why I mention the language books).
    I say that it will get better. And go work out! It will make you feel better, really. If I get sick or don’t work out regularly, I never want to go back because I always feel like I’ve waited too long and I’m too far behind from where I was and I’ll never get back to it… but it’s a lie. It’s a big fat lie. I go and it’s hard at first but your body wants to be in motion and be active. And it elevates your mood. So win win!
    I hope you feel better soon.

  27. I just want to say your blog seriously just makes my day sometimes. I have had just a roller coaster of a last few months with switching jobs and a long term boyfriend dumping me along with just crushing my sort of strong self. Hang in there, I don’t know you but in a way it always feels like I am reading something from a friend reading your stuff. I think from your personality and suave smarts that someone has to appreciate it in this crazy job world :) I think the whole winter being awful and depressing never helps ever. I think we all need a bit of spring sunshine to rock us out of this gloom :) I just finished reading The Good Luck of Right Now and there were just some great life quotes about how to pull through the darker parts of life and keep on growing. I think you would enjoy it!!

  28. I’m sorry about the job. I’ve been unemployed intermittently for a couple of years now and it really does bring you down.

  29. If we were having coffee (or rather you coffee and me some tea) I would tell you that I started reading a book (wielding colour) and it’s just very hard to get into it. I would also tell you that I’m looking for another book to just blow me off my feet because I just want that high again. I want more good books and less mediocre ones.

    I’d also tell you about feeling useless at my internship and already hating it two weeks in, even though I have 13 more weeks to go. I hope I will be able to transfer to a different place because staying here would just suck the life out of me. Everyday at that place leaves my me feeling horrible because I have no utility in the place, however nice everyone is being to me. I like having a purpose when I work and I like doing lots of work to keep my day moving forward. I love making to do lists and being able to tick the boxes as my day moves along. And I have none of that now and it makes me sad, annoyed and restless.
    I’d also wish you a lot of strength for you continuing jobhunt and hope you hit gold soon. You deserve it a lot.

  30. You probably hear this a lot and so to an extent it doesn’t ‘mean’ anything anymore, but the perfect job is out there waiting for you… It may feel all doom and gloom now but things will pick up. Just keep up persevering, seeking your goal and good things will come your way!

  31. Oh, sweetie. So many of us know your pain with the job search. It’s one thing to be phenomenal, it’s another to convince a potential employer. And the whole cycle is ridiculous: not having a job, trying to find one, can’t get the job because of a long break/”lack of experience,” but the only way to get out of that break or lack of experience is to get a job/experience!

    If we were having coffee, I’d stop drinking the coffee and give you a hug.

  32. Aw! I feel you on the job thing, I really do. Wouldn’t it be better if we could just run after certain companies and scream “LET ME LOVE YOOOOOU!”? And I’m glad everything’s okay with your family now. :)

  33. I really hope you can find a job this year. I know how frustrating it can be.

    I’ve actually been doing really good with my working out this year, which is the complete opposite from how I usually am. If you want, we can motivate each other!

  34. What a cool feature! And looking at all the trackbacks, others think so too! Hang in there, as tough as it can be. It seems that a lot of people are going through quite the hardships this winter and each time their hopes get lifted, something else happens to make them sink. We’re here for you, though with no coffee in hand. Perhaps a hot chocolate…or at the very least wine this afternoon. :)

  35. First of all, I super love this idea! Second of all, I feel you on almost all of these. Last year, I went from being a stay at home mom for 3 years to a divorced single mom who hadn’t worked in over 4 years. I had no money and no job and had to live with my aunt. No one wanted to interview me because I had such a huge gap in employment history. However, after months of searching, I landed a pretty cool job and made a ton of new best friends. We even started a work book club! I’m so grateful for all the other things not working out, because it lead me right where I needed to be. I know it’s hard and if I was there I’d give you a big hug. You might have been perfect for that job, and it is a huge bummer that you didn’t get it, but maybe it’s all leading you to where you need to be? I think so anyway.

    I’d also tell you I am totally over winter and in kind of a reading slump as well, despite going on a drunken wine book buying spree on Amazon last week. I just started reading The Taker by Alma Katsu, so I have high hopes that it will pull me out of it. I’ll be sending good vibes your way to get you out of your reading slump as well!

  36. *settles into seat with cup of tea and prepares to chat*
    I’m reading Sense and Sensibility right now. I challenged myself to (re)read all of Jane Austen’s books, reading one every other month. I put off S&S and now I’m sort of rushing. Trying not to be annoyed as I chose to read this so I may have to force myself to be ok with not finishing it until next month. As much as I love Austen, she’s not an easy author to read.
    Sending hugs for the fam and an especially big one for you. I had an interview two and a half weeks ago and haven’t heard anything. I had to turn down another job that was just too far away and would have required a move and still too much driving. I’m wondering what’s wrong with me and wondering why I can’t get a job. I blame myself because I chose to leave my job to try publishing internships and now I can’t find paid work. I’m frustrated and depressed and considering going back to school (again) but I can’t see how it’d be useful. It’ll get better…it has to.
    Oh gosh..last vacation? A road trip two years ago this upcoming fall with the boyfriend. We’re excited for our upcoming trip to Australia and I love my family for giving me the money to be able to go.
    Erm. Haven’t watching Breaking Bad. The boyfriend and I keep thinking maybe we should but neither of us think we’d love it so we haven’t yet. Maybe when we finish our binge (re)watching of House.
    I’m Canadian so winter is just a part of life but it has been a bad one. I’m ready for warmth.
    I think we’re getting to the age (I think I’m a year younger than you) where we are finally ok with how elementary and even high school friendships have turned out. Some friends are worth hanging onto and I think that’s another thing we realize at this age…when to make it work (like with your former bff) and when to let go.
    No BEA for me this year (yet again) because that’s when we’ll be in Australia. I WILL be there next year. It takes place over my birthday and it’ll be my 28th on the 28th next year. I must be in NYC for that. Hopefully you can make it this year :)
    I was doing well on commenting then…I just slacked. I hear you about wanting a kick in the pants to get into gear.
    Here’s to being a hamster on a wheel together. Totally get what you’re feeling. What else can we do? And how depressing is it that so many of us are in the same freaking wheel? I’m hoping to feel better soon and I hope you do, too.

  37. I love these posts!! I’m so stressed about exams at the moment and keeping everything balanced. Blogging comes last a lot and that sucks. I hate the pressure people put to churn out so many reviews and posts. Sometimes I can only manage a couple a week.
    I hope things get better for you. If we were having coffee I would give you a huge hug and tell you things are going to work out! Summer is coming, spring is in the air (I seriously cannot wait for some sun)!! Also, WORK OUT! Don’t beat yourself up about it, but exercising makes me feel so much better and clears my head when I’m sick of stressing out. Hope you have a better time this week!

  38. I loved this post! I’m a bit obsessed with all things coffee, so you had me at …COFFEE! :)
    My response was a bit long so this just inspired me to write a blog post myself.
    If ya wanna, you can check it out here :)
    http://missdreamymarie.wordpress.com/2014/02/24/if-we-were-having-coffee/

  39. If we were having coffee right now, I’d suggest we get extra dessert for extra good vibes. Looks like we both need them, what with our winter blues and life crises mixing all together into this chaos that brings us up and down.

    I’m currently reading LOVE & CHAOS, the second of the Brooklyn Girls series by Gemma Burgess. Gotta say, I’m loving being immersed in the lives of these girls again, particularly main character Angie! If you’re looking for something fun and easy to read, you should definitely try Brooklyn Girls again.

    I’m sorry about the job thing. It really is hard trying to find a job in this current state, and it sucks that the opportunity you were hoping for didn’t pan out. As always, I’m still praying for you that you will get an amazing job that utilizes the skills you possess to the fullest — and that you enjoy.

    Gosh, the last trip I went on! Hmm. I did a quick road trip down to DC-MD-VA with my family in December, and it was lovely. We visited family friends, went skiing and just visited the sights. It was so good to spend quality time with them and just hang out.

    Yeah, Winter needs to go back into hibernation now. THE COLD ALWAYS BOTHERS ME ANYWAY.

    As for “friends”, leave them. You deserve good, solid, REAL friendships. It sucks to lose people that you’ve shared some history with, but at least you’re not dealing with unhealthy or unhelpful relationships anymore.

    Working out (or trying to) has been interesting for me. I’ve seriously started doing it, but stopped last week because I wasn’t feeling well. Time to get back on the horse and keep my energy levels up.

    BEA! I’m still debating about it, actually. It’s more because of the $$$ situation I’m currently in. Even though it’s extremely accessible for me, the fee is pretty hefty. Still, it’s really fun to see so many bookish friends and authors I love and publishers gathered in one place.

    As for commenting, I’m just slacking these days! I try though, and usually manage to catch up. Don’t let the pressure get to you. Just leaving a meaningful comment when you can is still pretty important.

    What else would I say? Oh, that I’m a little homesick these days — missing family and friends and the husband. That I wish the visa application would be done already so husband can come. That I want to write, but I’m afraid of that blank page, that my words won’t be worthy of it. That work can be tedious and boring, but I need this job to pay the bills. That I want an adventure in the great wide somewhere. That I need to learn to budget better.

    But most importantly, that there is still hope that good things will come my way (and yours).

  40. I know I’m about a week late here but since I am literally drinking coffee as I read this I want to answer!

    I am bummed to hear about Half Bad because I was looking forward to that one. I just finished Cured, the second in the Stung series about the bees that disappeared and I really liked it!

    I know you will end up with a great job! I am sure it is so hard to wait it out in the interim when you just want to be using your brain in the place that you trained it for though! I will keep my fingers crossed for you that something comes up soon!

    That kind of vacation sounds heavenly. I just want 24 hours where no children touch me. I love them dearly but I have been nursing my tiny minion for 19 months now. I am really looking forward to the end of that. Even though it’s sweet and amazing. 19 months dude!

    I can’t seem to read and watch tv in the same time period. I get sucked in to TV on netflix or amazon and watch until I can’t stay awake. Then there’s no time for reading. I was watching Sons of Anarchy though, and I do kinda miss seeing Jax!

    Where do you live? I would cry! I hate winter too! I hate being cold! I am in SC and we have had snow and a bad ice storm. I am so over it!

    That makes me sad too! I hate when there is a parting of the ways with friends. Usually though, it is for the best and it sounds like that was the case here. YAY margaritas!

    So, I went on the paleo diet last year and I lost about 35 pounds or so. I actually had to add non paleo foods (rice and beans) back into my diet because I lost too much weight. SO It’s great but I think I have the strength of a wet noodle. I wish we lived close so we could motivate each other to go to the gym! I am dying to try crossfit but I am CHICKEN!

    I have never been to BEA and that makes me sad. It is so far away that I just haven’t been able to afford it. Oh, and then there’s the fact that I have 3 minions that need me. UGH. (as a side note, I really do love the kids, lol)

    Don’t worry over replies and commenting. If you have to force yourself to do it, it’s not worth it. Wait until you can do it because you want to. That way what you say will have meaning, you know?

    How about I give you some opposite advice then? How about you give yourself a day to wallow. Take a whole day to feel sad and mad and depressed. Sleep, veg on tv, eat junk and do nothing. Go to bed early. Sometimes we avoid having our sad emotions for so long that they leak out in small pieces and infect our whole day everyday anyway. Give into it for just one day. When you wake up the next day, get up early and eat a good breakfast and go for a walk or run. Whatever exercise you enjoy. Purge your system and reboot with all the best things the next day and hopefully the negative stuff will be at a more manageable level until you get to a better place! HUGS from me!

  41. If we were having coffee….
    …I would tell you that, after living in Children’s books world for a couple of weeks, I picked a reread book from my “bookshelf bag” that reacquainted me with The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, a book I read when I was in undergrad and loved! And last night I sat down and read 65 pages at once. I forgot how wonderful and lyrical that story is. It’s like seeing an old friend after a long time.
    …I’d admit I haven’t watched Breaking Bad yet, but ASSURE you that I will watch it this summer with my Hubby. So don’t worry.
    …I’d tell you I was restless, too. I want to get a passport and use it! I want to explore parts of the world I only read about. I want to escape and go somewhere other than the parents/in-laws house. I want to go somewhere!
    …I’d tell you that I’ve been having a rough time with recurring feelings of abandonment from friendships of my past. It still haunts me (especially in my dreams) and it’s just rough.
    …I’d thank you for these types of posts. I love your honesty.

  42. The song says: Keep Your Head Up! (Ben Howard if you didn’t know this one) You will find a job! I know how it feels hopeless, not being able to find a job, Ive been there too! I’ve been on that bench for a half a year. Eventually everything will work out.

    Good luck!

    Irene @ Ice Queen’s Bookshelf

Trackbacks

  1. […] just finished reading and really enjoyed Jamie’s If We Were Having Coffee post.  I have wanted to get more personal in my blogging while still remaining mostly a book […]

  2. […] posts when I’m reading a blog, so when I saw Jamie over at The Perpetual Page-Turner post her If We Were Having Coffee segment, I knew I’d found my answer! We’re changing things up a little here because […]

  3. […] got the idea for this post from The Perpetual Page Turner. It looks like a great way to get a few miscellaneous things off my chest, out of my mind and let […]

  4. […] at Perpetual Page-Turner posted recently as if she were chatting with someone, in person, face-to-face, at a coffee shop.  […]

  5. […] Diana at Part Time Monster introduced me to this feature that starts out, If We Were Having Coffee . . . ., where the idea is to have the kind of conversation you’d have over a cup of coffee or tea. She isn’t the first person to do this. In fact, I did a search and found all kinds of people involved. For example, one of Jamie’s coffee breaks can be found here. […]

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