If We Were Having Coffee

I saw a life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself in November 2013 because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial post so I made it a  reoccurring thing for the past couple of years and do it when I feel so inclined!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got a hard root beer right now (AMAZINGNESS but dangerous because you forget it’s booze).

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m currently reading The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up and just starting the second book in the Vampire Academy series.  I’d ask you what you are currently reading!

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that even though I’ve been doing a little bit of traveling/vacationing this summer I am in one of these moods where I’m so antsy because I want to be everywhere in the world right now. I just get frustrated by the fact that in order to travel you need money (which lol at my bank account right now) and in order to get money you need a job….oh and most jobs give you like NOT ENOUGH VACATION TIME. I just want to explore and go places and I follow too many travel blogs and people who are traveling right now and the wanderlust is so, so strong. It’s always strong but it’s like this unbearable sort of strong right now. I’m trying to plan my trip to Spain next year but I just can’t because I WANT TO GO NOW.  Is this normal human behavior? IDK BECAUSE WILL DOESN’T GET LIKE THIS. He wants to go places but he isn’t like physically pained and antsy like I am.

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that I’ve decided Will and I are going to start home brewing beer. On vacation my cousin and his girlfriend were talking about how they do it and brought us some (it was an amazing saison) and I’m like OMG WE ARE DOING THIS. 1) we love beer and 2) I decided we needed a hobby to do together. We have a ton of our hobbies that we do separately and then we have like THINGS we enjoy together and do together but nothing that’s a ~hobby~. I’d ask you, if you were OF AGE, what’s the last great beer you had/if you home brew or know anybody that does. I’d also ask, if you were married or dating, if you have a hobby that you do as a couple!

If we were having coffee…. Id tell you that I cleaned out my clothes in my closet this past week using the KonMari method (the cleaning book I was talking about further up) and MAN did I have a lot of clothes. I’m really bad about getting rid of clothes. More so than books (I’ve talked about my ruthlessness before). I really struggled with it. You are supposed to ask yourself if  the item “sparks joy” and only keep what does. Well, the problem is that I can’t tell if something sparks joy or if my clothes hoarding voice is CREATING a sense of joy when I think about it. UGH UGH UGH. It’s so hard. I would say I got rid of about 40% of my clothes and shoes. I know I could have done better but it’s good enough for me right now. I’m going to continue on with it for the rest of my items but oof that was hard. I’d ask you if you’ve done the KonMari method (ALL THE RAGE RIGHT NOW) and if you are also a clothing hoarder. Like seriously I had stuff in there from high school and early college years which was like circa 2002-2008. OOF.

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you that I’ve been craving a really good non-fiction title. I don’t even really care what about. I want to learn about anything. I want to just read something interesting! I’d ask you for recs!!

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you about my efforts to try and create a nice, relaxing morning routine and how maybe it works like 30% of the time. I think I’m destined to have the kind of morning routine where I wake up miserably and late and rush around and eat my eggs in the car while trying to remember if I brushed my hair at all this morning only to realize no I didn’t and oh hey I don’t even have a hairband on my wrist when typically I have like 5 on each wrist somehow. In my head I envision these peaceful mornings with the sun shining in and I do some yoga (I don’t even do yoga) and I sip my tea and listen to Enya (is Enya still around?) and like create wonderful shit before 7am. HOW HARD IS THAT, SELF? I’d ask you what your morning routine is like!

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you how Will and I really need to make friends with other dating/married couples. All the couple friends were part of the group that we are no longer part of and the few others we had either a) broke up or b) moved away (our last couple friend who moved to Spain last week). HOW DO YOU FIND COUPLE FRIENDS? THERE SHOULD BE AN APP FOR THIS….an app to like “date” other couples to find a good match. I just miss having another couple to go out and do things with. It’s really hard to make friends in general at this age. It used to be so easy…WOAH COOL SPARKLY SHOES LET’S BE FRIENDS! INSTA BESTIES ON THE PLAYGROUND. Maybe this still works as an adult? IDK maybe I will try it.

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If we were having coffee….I’d you that I feel like I’m finding it harder to find new FAVORITE books and movies. I LIKE and even super LOVE a lot of things I consume but I’m having a hard time finding those life changing things that just stop you in your tracks and just speak to every cell in your entire body and you don’t know how you possibly lived life without having experienced it before. I don’t know if it’s just that I’m hard to impress BECAUSE I consume so many books and entertainment or what but UGH…I want that FEELING. Do you know that feeling? I’d ask you what the last thing that gave you that feeling was.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’ve been having a hard time with nostalgia lately. I don’t know why. I’m just suddenly MISSING things and people and moments from the past (really really missing my college years…I felt so free then). The way things were. I love the way things are SO MUCH and am so happy with who I am but I’m also yearning for different parts of who I was before. I don’t know if it’s that I’m turning 30 in a couple of months but the nostalgia is starting to weigh on me. When I was cleaning my closet out and I’d pull out these clothes all these memories just came flooding back — my trip to Europe, dates with Will when we were in college, moments with friends I’m no longer friends with. GAH. MAKE IT STOP. I have nostalgia feels every now and again but these are so strong lately. I’d ask you what the hell was wrong with me. But rhetorically speaking obviously. I mean, unless you are a psychologist and can tell me what’s literally wrong with me.

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

If We Were Having Coffee

I saw a life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself in November 2013 because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial post so I made it a  reoccurring thing for the past couple of years and do it when I feel so inclined!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got a lemon shandy right now (it’s afternoon right now, okay!) and it’s divine.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m currently reading This Lullaby by Sarah Dessen and Fates and Furies by Lauren Groff. Also, I’m audiobooking The Running Dream by Wendelin Van Draanen. I’d ask you what you are currently reading!

If we were having coffee... I’d tell you how much of a FUN summer Will and I are having already and we have so many other fun things planned I can barely contain my excitement. I’ve enjoyed beach days and pool days and nights out and good food and ice cream and concerts and new beer and just SO MUCH FUN. I’m really thankful it’s been a fun summer and it’s been really nice to feel so happy after a crappy winter! I’d ask what you have been up to thus far this summer!

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If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that I opened up that THING…better known as a story…that I had told you about before. I had written like a paragraph or two last summer, bawled and then never opened the document again. It’s been sitting on my desktop untouched but all the while ideas have come to me for it. It’s a contemporary YA (I think..idk she just finished her first year of college) and it’s so personal and I am not even a good writer nor have I ever wanted to write a novel before. BUT WHAT THE HELL. I OPENED IT. I WROTE A SENTENCE OR TWO TO ADD TO WHAT I HAD. WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS.  I’d ask if you are an aspiring writer. If so, do you have any tips??

If we were having coffee…. Id tell that recently I’ve been thinking a lot about fear and how I can recognize places in my life where it has held me back. I know that sometimes fear is there to protect us but also I’m starting to see how I use it as a crutch and it kind of makes me sad. I don’t want to let myself live so fearfully and I don’t know when I started REALLY letting fear get in my way.

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you that I’ve really been wanting to get into podcasts. I’d ask you for recs!!

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I’ve really been having a weird relationship with social media. I’ve been so disillusioned by it recently? I don’t even know if that’s what I mean. I just…sometimes I’m so weary from it. I get overwhelmed by it. I think “WHY DO I PUT SO MUCH TIME AND ENERGY AND STOCK IN ALL THIS?” I have nothing to say sometimes. I’m over the over-documentation and wading through the picture perfect shininess to get to the realness. The constant barrage of voices and options and links and possibilities of people and things to follow and knowledge and opinions. BUT THEN OTHER DAYS I AM LIKE OMG I LOVE THE INTERNET. IT IS THE BEST. I’ve been a lot more MIA than I used to be (especially on Twitter) and I feel like the balance has really been helping me. I’d ask you how you deal with social media fatigue.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you how last time I was lamenting all my workout woes and how I couldn’t get back on the workout wagon and I’d like to inform you that I’ve been working out again and IT FEELS SO GOOD. I mean really. Sure, it’s nice to lose a little weight and look toned and wink at yourself in the mirror because you are like DAMN GIRL YOU LOOK GOOD. But most of it is about how I truly feel. I hate every moment while I muster up motivation and all the way through the workout until I think of how I feel after. How energized I am. Or how I think about how badass my body feels when I can hold a plank for longer or do more burpees than usual. It makes me feel like I can conquer anything…well not during my workout…mostly I’m a whiny baby…but AFTER. HEAR ME ROAR.

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If we were having coffee….I’d you that I’ve been having A REALLY spectacular reading year thus far in 2015. It’s been kind of magical — a great mix of 2015 releases and older books and things I missed last year that seemed to be beloved by others I trust. I don’t want to jinx myself but MAN OH MAN IT’S BEEN GOOD. I’d ask you how 2015 has been treating you reading wise!

If we were having coffee…I was thinking the other day while going through some of my old college papers while cleaning a box from my old room at my stepdad’s (and was talking with book club about it this morning) about how much I MISS school. And not even SCHOOL itself. But learning things. And I know I am learning things all the time and blah blah blah. But I miss learning a specific skill or subject. So I’ve decided I’m going to challenge myself to learn a new thing this summer. I’d ask you WHAT THE HELL I SHOULD LEARN! haha

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

If We Were Having Coffee

I saw a life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself in November 2013 because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial post that I wanted to make it a reoccurring thing!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got water with lemon right now. Love that H2O.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m currently reading Written in the Stars by Aisha Saeed. Still too early on to have an opinion but I love reading about different cultures from my own and arranged marriage is something I’m not familiar with on a personal level obviously. Before that I just finished Bone Gap by Laura Ruby which was sooo interesting. I am still trying to unpack that one. I’d ask you what you are reading and what you just finished before that…

If we were having coffee... I’d tell you I’m really excited for how my late spring/summer is shaping up — so many good book events, concerts, vacations, etc. that Will and I have planned! We started putting it all out on a calendar and I’m just GIDDY with excitement. I’d ask you what you are planning on doing this summer.

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that I’m failing on my 30 before 30 list that I had told you that I made. I haven’t crossed many off so now I have to kick it into high gear. 30 is coming up sooooon (in October). I’d ask you how you tackle your more random goals (ie things that are of importance to you but not like pressing matters). Because right now my list is just SITTING THERE.

If we were having coffee…. Id tell you that the last time we talked I was feeling super discouraged with blogging but I would LOVE to update you that I’m feeling really good about it right now. Nothing really has changed but somewhere along the line my mindset did because look, internally, I’m REALLY happy about what I do here and feel excited about everything I post. So what is there to care about otherwise? I think the nice Spring weather is boosting my mood but who knows. Also been brainstorming some things I’m really excited about. SO YAY.

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you that I’ve been having a really hard time with some changes going on in my life. SO, my stepdad is great. He’s like a second dad to me (I had both of them walk me down the aisle). I lived with him until I got married even after my mom passed in 2006 and he’s just really important to me. He’s been dating this woman for a while and they will be getting married in September. My personal feelings about her are complicated (long story short: she’s caused fractures between this relationship for both myself and my sister) but I WANT him to be happy. It’s hard. And then the fact that soon she will be moving into MY HOUSE? The house where my stepdad, mom, sister and I lived for all those years. I’m having to box up my stuff (I’ve kept stuff we can’t fit in the apartment there in my old room) and get it ALL out because her sons are moving in and will TAKE our rooms and it’s just all so weird. I know his life is moving on but it’s so weird that I’ll go there and the place where I see all MY memories will not be mine anymore. I won’t have a room. I won’t be able to just go in there as I please like I do now. I stop by, eat food and just hang out all the time. And all the touches that my mom put on that house? I know they are just going to be painted over and things will be taken down and changed. I would almost rather him sell the house rather than have to still visit MY house but it won’t really be mine anymore. I spent a lot of time this past week there by myself packing up my room and just crying. A LOT. I know it’s inevitable but it’s just so hard to watch yet another part of my mom just get erased in some ways. It was comforting to go there because that house was still so much my mom just reflected in everything that is in it and the decorating.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I’m still struggling with what to do next with my life. I’m still nannying for the time being and haven’t really been sending out as many resumes. I needed a mental health break from it. I feel like it’s been so long since I’ve had a “real job” in marketing at this point that nobody is going to hire me. But like…it’s not by choice? I started nannying because I had to pay my bills somehow while I job searched. And here we are over a year later and I’m still nannying. I’d ask if you had any advice for me.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you how I’m having such a hard time working out these days. I was doing so good last year and this year I can’t stay consistent. I’d ask you if you have an exercise routine and, if so, what it is.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you about how I’m so thankful for many of my friendships but especially my one girlfriend who I get together with every Wednesday for wine night. I’ve been so awful about making an effort to get together with friends but having this standing date reminds me how much I love getting together with friends.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m PRETTY SURE I’m going to BEA again this year. PRETTY SURE. Year #5 of BEA if so! I’d ask you, if you were a blogger/librarian/teacher/bookseller, etc., if you were going too.

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

If We Were Having Coffee

I saw a life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself in November 2013 because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial post that I wanted to make it a reoccurring thing!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got a warm water with lemon, cayenne pepper and cinnamon.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m almost done with Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel which I’m really impressed with. I also just started Wildlife by Fiona Wood but I’m like two pages into it so I can’t say much. I’d ask you what you were reading.

If we were having coffee... I’d tell you that I haven’t been doing well lately. And that it’s a hard thing to admit. (because it’s embarrassing. Because I feel over-dramatic. Because I can’t tell you exactly why). When someone asks you how you are it’s easy to be like FINE and move on. But I’m not fine. Why should I pretend? Because of things and how I’ve been doing, I’ve been so disconnected from people and social media and this blog. I’d apologize for unanswered tweets, comments, etc. It’s just so difficult for me to interact when I feel so awful. I’d wonder if you’ve noticed my disconnect and flakiness lately because I feel really self conscious about it. That’s part of the reason I decided to write up one of these posts (it’s been a while) because I want to connect again.  I’d ask how you are doing and really WANT to know just beyond the typical response.

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you how I’m FREAKING OUT over the fact that this month I will turn 29. It will officially be the last year of my 20’s and I don’t know what to do with it. I WANT TO STAY HERE. My face doesn’t match the age so aren’t I allowed to stay in my 20’s until it catches up?? I’d also tell you how most of the time I don’t ever feel like an adult. Like am I REALLY an adult? I don’t know. I do adult-y type things I guess but mostly I feel like the kid putting the grownup high heels and mom’s makeup stash all over my face. HOW DID ALL THESE YEARS JUST HAPPEN? HOW AM I ALMOST 29?? I kind of feel sick over it truthfully. How fast life truly does go. Days turn into weeks into months and suddenly you are older. In a flash. I’d ask if you ever feel this way.

If we were having coffee…. Id tell you how discouraged I’ve been feeling with my blog lately. It’s so unlike me to care or notice but traffic and general interaction has been down (says the girl who has been a shit blog reader). I never put my blog happiness and well-being into these things so why am I RIGHT THIS MOMENT? I think maybe it has to do with where I’m at right now so I’m just feeling really discouraged about LOTS of things. But also I get this nagging feeling that it’s me. That what I’m doing isn’t good enough. You all are bored of me. I don’t have anything to say anymore. I should quit. My inner monologue has been horrible. I have been focused too much on creation and consumption that I’m losing the beauty in it all. I’d ask, if you were a blogger, if you feel this way ever?

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you how I’m not looking forward to the cold weather and winter but this year I’m trying REALLY hard to make the most of it. Find new activities. Really embrace the things I DO love in this season. I’d ask you what your favorite cold weather activities are/what you do when the winter chases you inside? If you lived in perpetual beautiful weather I’d give you the stink eye and ask you to house me for the winter months.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you how a conversation with my dad was what I needed to reframe my whole job/career situation outlook. I’m going to be pursuing some new ideas with the job search and be more thankful for the flexibility nannying gives me. (I MEAN ALL SUMMER I GOT TO BE OUTSIDE). I’d ask who your go-to person is who always helps you reframe a problem.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that we should go out for Thai food because I’m really craving it. LIKE REALLY REALLY BADLY.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I am often frustrated because I don’t have anything that I’m really good at. I wish I was artistic or could sing or like running. I always thought I’d find my THING at this point in my life but ALAS no talents here except expert procrastination and eating ice cream like nobody’s business. I’d ask you about what you are talented at.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you how I was reading a post from a blogger (not a book blogger) who experienced a devastating apartment fire and I’ve been thinking a lot about THINGS. How much value we place in them. How they can be gone in an instant. I started thinking about what things I would be sad about losing in a fire. (Answer: pretty much everything haha). My time of being unemployed and us being really scarily tight with money taught me a lot about what I buy and what I use and I’ve become a lot more of a minimalist in ways and have tried not to get attached to THINGS. It’s hard. I’d ask you what would be the one thing you’d miss the most if this happened to you.

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

If We Were Having Coffee #2

I saw a blogger/life coach I love, Ashley, do a post entitled If We Were Having Coffee and I decided to take her lead and do one myself because I loved it and sometimes I feel like we forget that there is a whole life behind the people that write and read blogs. I got such a great response to my initial that I wanted to make it a reoccurring thing!

 

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So, grab your coffee/beverage of your choice and meet me for a chat. I’ve got water right now because it’s far too late for coffee for me.  I actually wish I was having a jack & ginger right now because it’s been that kind of a week but alas I am not. What are you having?

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I’m in the middle of Half Bad by Sally Green which I started out loving but have hit a wall with. I don’t know if it’s the crazy of this week or what but it’s kind of causing me to be in a slump. I’m also in the middle of The Sea of Tranquility which is going a bit better. I’d ask you what you were reading.

If we were having coffee... I’d tell you that this week drained me. There was a bit of a family crisis that involved my sister and her two babies (Genevieve and Adela) staying here with Will and I in our one bedroom (things are fine now) and then I found out on Wednesday that I didn’t get the job I interviewed for and was really excited about. I was at my nannying gig when I found out and it took everything not to just break down and cry. I started crying the minute I got in my car. I’m just so frustrated. I KNOW I would have been amazing at that job and I just don’t know why I can’t get a job in my field (marketing/social media). And I feel so stressed because of this long term unemployment. I’ve done everything in my power to find a job and I can’t and I KNOW that jobs just penalize you even more when you are out of work. And all I want to scream is I DID NOT ASK TO BE LAID OFF FROM MY PREVIOUS JOB!!!

If we were having coffee.… I’d tell you that I need a vacation. I need to go somewhere where I don’t speak the language and explore and eat new foods. My soul needs it…to recharge. To feel even more alive.  I’d ask you about the last trip you went on.

If we were having coffee…. I would tell you how I seriously cannot stop mourning the fact that Breaking Bad is over. Will and I binge watched it in December and I can’t stop thinking it. I feel like no other shows compare for me at this point. I’d ask you if you’ve watched it and if you said no then I’d (lovingly) bully you into it.

If we were having coffee…. I’d tell you how this winter is going to be my undoing. I’m NOT a winter girl at all. I hate it. If it weren’t for family I’d be on the first flight out of here to live somewhere warm. This winter has been BRUTAL. In fact, the news keeps telling me it’s the THIRD snowiest winter we’ve ever had. DIE, MOTHER NATURE, DIE. And the fun part? WINTER IS NOT EVEN OVER. Between getting stuck in traffic for 4 hours (should have only been 25 minutes), having below zero temps, my car door being so frozen multiple mornings that I can’t shut it, having to dig out my car, falling on ice and having to drive in shitty conditions…I’M JUST OVER IT.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you how I went to a party for my former bff’s 1 year old kid (to support HER because we’ve been working on things) and I had to see my old group for the first time in over a year. There were only a couple of people who actually acknowledged us/talked to us and the rest of the people literally ignored us. It’s so sad to see friends I’ve had since middle school and high school just act like I’m not there. I had my reasons for leaving that group but this showed me it was the right decision when I thought about how none of them have even tried to reach out/basically showed me how shallow those friendships always were. I was just so disappointed that there wasn’t even hellos or “it’s been so long! How have you been?” from any of them. It give me the major sads. I would also tell you how Will and I went out for burritos and margaritas afterwards and I no longer gave a shit about what transpired.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I slacked off on working out in 2014 so far. I was really dedicated last year and then I started the year off sick and I just have not regained my mojo. SOMEONE PLEASE KICK ME INTO GEAR.

If we were having coffee….I’d tell you that I really want to go to BEA again this year and would be really sad to miss it after having gone every year since I’ve been blogging. It’s more about being able to hang out with people than it is about the books but I really look forward to it. Everything is so up in the air because I don’t know what I’ll be doing job-wise by then and who knows if I’ll be able to get off the time. FINGERS CROSSED IT WILL WORK OUT. I’d ask you if YOU were going and if you didn’t know what it is, because maybe you don’t blog or you are new, I would tell you ALL about it..how it is a bookish heaven.

If we were having coffee…I’d tell you that I’m really behind in replying to comments on my blog and visiting other blogs. It’s embarrassing honestly. And I feel bad. I don’t know what’s up with me lately HOWEVER..I’m working on it.

If we were having coffee… I’d tell you that I’m honestly having the hardest time keeping my spirits up these days with this whole looking for a job thing. I keep having to look for bright spots in my day — your comments and tweets being one of them — and it’s just really, really hard just not to give up. I’ve never felt so demoralized in my life and I feel like I’m doing the best I can and asking for helping and doing All The Things You Are Supposed To Do and it’s not getting me anywhere. Something’s gotta give eventually, right? Everyone tells me to “keep on going” and I KNOW that’s what I’m supposed to do but I feel like I’m just a hamster on a wheel at this point.

 

If we were having coffee…what would you tell me? Come on…lay it all out! It’s just you, me, the pleasant sounds of a cafe…and maybe some other eyes in the comment section but NBD right?? Our we can have coffee in my inbox if you don’t feel comfortable. I really want to know! What’s going on with you?

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