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The Perpetual Page-Turner

The Perpetual Page-Turner

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Home | Uncategorized | Why I’ve Been MIA Lately

Why I’ve Been MIA Lately

September 19, 2016 - Updated September 19, 2016 // 57 Comments

I’ve been pretty quiet in the past week and I figured I’d give a little update even though I’m not normally one to explain my absences with blogging — because sometimes I just take little breaks and I don’t feel like I need to explain it. BUT this is a relevant life update so it seems different. And honestly it’s the first time I feel like I could type this out without crying.

It’s interesting how you can wake up one morning and have your day just not at all go as you expected it to and everything kind of changes. That was this past Wednesday.

Processed with VSCOcam with 6 preset

(if you are squeamish this paragraph might be one to skip)

We woke up at 5am to blood in our bed that was where our dog was laying. It wasn’t enough blood that I was like “OMG SOMEONE IS DYING” but it was enough blood that I was like WTF!!!! So we tried to figure out where the blood was coming from and couldn’t really find anywhere and then I realized it was coming out of a certain area of his body that I don’t want to write out for fear of getting weird search terms or spam comments….if you are understanding. Will almost passed out (I mean, it was bad but Will cannot handle blood at all).

So I got an appointment at the vet and he said it looked like trauma and I was like that’s so bizarre but he did have a really rough play session with one of his doggie friends the night before and he did try to hurdle him so maybe he came down harder than I thought on him. So I take him back with me to work (the kids loved that) and he just chilled with me.

So we come home and Will is home at the same time as us and I’m like “I’m going to clean off the dried blood on his belly” where I assumed he had just slept in his own blood. So I get him on his back and I’m like “Wow! There are way more spots than this morning but he hasn’t actively bled anymore.” Then I try to clean the spots up and none of them are coming up. And the more I looked at his stomach I’m like there is just something not right and Will agreed. They looked like bruises or something that had just spread up his stomach.

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

So I call my vet but they were closing so she gave me the first available appointment in the morning and said to go to the one emergency vet that is 24/7 if we felt like it was getting worse. We waited a whole 10 minutes before our gut reactions told us to call the emergency vet. I called and she told us she really wants him to come in because she’s afraid he might be bleeding internally. So we left immediately. And then on the way to the vet…he started bleeding out of his nose. That’s when I lost it. I mean, I walked into that place sobbing uncontrollably.

So they took him back and we waited for many hours until they finally admitted him. They said that they couldn’t find any platelets (like zero) and so his body wasn’t clotting and those little spots were like just bruises spreading because he was bleeding under his skin. They tested him for a bunch of stuff and were pretty sure he had immune mediated thrombocytopenia which basically means his body was attacking its own platelets which could be really life-threatening because he could start bleeding in worse places. Luckily we caught it decently early because he could have bleed to death.

Finnikin the dog

So they admitted him that Wednesday night and we didn’t get to pick him up until Saturday. I was a MESS. Literally I couldn’t stop crying pretty much that whole time. My poor baby. He’s such a good dog and we just celebrated his 1 year adoption anniversary last week and now to see him like this and possibly lose him? My heart was just breaking for my little goofball who has made me so immensely happy this past year that we’ve had him.

They put him on some steroids and medicine and he was stable (though his red blood cell started to go down but then went back up) in all other ways. But those platelets just wouldn’t go up. By Saturday they said there as no reason to keep him there, even though they still can find no platelets, but he was stable enough that we could monitor him at home but we have to keep him super calm…because any scrape or bruise or microscopic injury could be life threatening for him in these next few days while we wait to see if he will respond to the treatments and his platelets go back up.

img_2551

(my poor sleepy baby)

 

We go on Thursday to get blood work (and hopefully good news) but now we just monitor him and keep him calm and hope for the best. He’s been super lethargic (which is good in our quest to make sure nothing else happens to him because he’s normally kind of hyper) and not himself but I’m just hoping he will get better.

I don’t know what it means for him long-term. It seems like something that will affect him for his life but I’m not sure because they are more concerned with getting him healthy before we can figure out everything going forward. There are apparently many causes to it (cancer, tick born illnesses (which they ruled that one out) but one could be vaccines –which he did just get a few weeks ago.

So that’s where I’ve been — an absolute emotional wreck and unable to do anything other than cry and watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (which is so funny and was the only time I basically stopped crying). And now just taking care of my buddy. So think good thoughts/say prayers for him — he’s doing much better but he’s definitely not out of the woods with this yet.

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About Jamie

Jamie is a 32 year old married lady (with a new baby!!) who is in denial that she's actually that old to be a married lady and a mom. When she's not reading you can find her doing Pilates followed by eating ice cream, belting out Hamilton (loud and offkey) and having adventures with her husband, daughter and rescue dog.

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Comments

  1. Julie @ Keep Calm With Books and Coffee says

    September 19, 2016 at 9:59 am

    Oh Jamie. I’m so sorry. I hope Finn will be back on his feet soon! My dog has been having health issues all summer and thinking about losing her has been some of the worst moments. I’ll be thinking of you and sending Finn lots of good vibes.

    Reply
  2. SweetMarie83 says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:00 am

    I’m so sorry to hear all this, Jamie! I know how much Finn means to you, so I can imagine it’s been torture. I’m thinking good thoughts for him and for you and Will, too! ♡

    Reply
  3. JG says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:04 am

    Aww poor guy. I hope you get good news on Thursday! We had a mini emergency with our schnauzer a few weeks back so I can totally understand what you are going through.

    Reply
  4. Jessica says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:10 am

    Poor Finn … and poor you! Our animals mean so much to us, and it’s so awful when something happens to them. Hoping for good news on Thursday! You’re in my thoughts.

    Reply
  5. Elizabeth says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:12 am

    So, so glad you caught it in time. You’re all in my thoughts! Hoping for a speedy recovery! Get well soon, Finn! Love to you all!

    Reply
    • Renee says

      September 19, 2016 at 10:19 am

      My heart goes out to you all. Wishing for the best!

      Reply
  6. Stacey says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:21 am

    It is so hard to see a furbaby suffer!! Hopefully he responds to treatment and a long term care plan can be put into place to help him live a long, healthy, happy life. Thoughts with you all.

    Reply
  7. Milka@ReadReadRead says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:29 am

    I had tears in my eyes while reading this, so I can only image how bad you are feeling right now! Dogs can very quickly become family members, and when something unexpected like this happens, it can be a huge blow! I hope Finn will recover and be his goofy self once again! I will keep you in my thoughts. All the best for you, Will and your little furball! <3

    Reply
  8. Tiff @ Mostly YA Lit says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:37 am

    Oh Jamie. I feel you. It’s so hard when you can’t do anything and you don’t know why something is happening to your pet. You can’t even explain to them why things are happening. UGH UGH UGH. Hoping and praying that his blood work comes back better and the vets can figure this out. Ginormous hugs. I’m thinking about you and your little family.

    Reply
  9. Sarah says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:43 am

    Oh! Posting on FB and here’s a blog link to when my kid had the same thing! http://imnotstarving.blogspot.com/2010/11/mofo-nofo-parental-psa-idiopathic.html

    Reply
  10. Cait says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:55 am

    I am so sorry for what you are going through! I teared up while reading this, because I know exactly how it feel to worry about your pets when they are injured/ill. I will absolutely keep Finn in my thoughts and I very much hope that his condition improves! *cyber hugs*

    Reply
  11. Steph says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:58 am

    I am so sorry to hear about this. I am glad he is stable for now but hope you find out what is causing it all and it can be treated long term. I love my furbaby so much and am so sad to hear when things like this happen to others. My thoughts are with you.

    Reply
  12. threegoodrats says

    September 19, 2016 at 11:02 am

    I’ve been following the story on twitter too, and I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Pet illnesses are the WORST. It’s so heartbreaking because they can’t tell you when they’re not feeling well or what makes them feel better. I’m so glad he’s home though – I think being home with family really makes a big difference. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that whatever is wrong with him is treatable or at least manageable. Hope he feels better soon!

    Reply
  13. Lola says

    September 19, 2016 at 11:24 am

    I am so sorry to hear about your dog getting sick and I really hope they can figure out what happened and he will get through this. I used to have pets and I know how much I worries when one of them wasn’t themselves. It really is tough to go through that. And reading this post just made me so sad, I feel so bad when animals are in pain. He looks so cute and adorable in those first two pictures and then so sad in the last one. Good luck to your and your dog!

    Reply
  14. Kay @ It's a Book Life says

    September 19, 2016 at 11:28 am

    I am so sorry Jamie! My puppy who I have also almost had for a year is family, and even when something small happens it makes my heart hurt. I will be sending you and Finn all the best thoughts/love I can. Hopefully now that he is at home with his mom and dad he will be able to heal/relax better. He is so adorable.

    Reply
  15. Emmah says

    September 19, 2016 at 12:30 pm

    I’ll definitely keep him in my prayers, along with both of y’all!

    Reply
  16. Jordan @ ForeverLostinLiterature says

    September 19, 2016 at 1:43 pm

    Oh my goodness, I am so sorry to hear this. There are few things more terrifying than when a loved one (furry or otherwise) is sick or hurt. It breaks my heart when my dogs have had issues, and I truly hope things continue looking up. My dog and I are sending over all our best vibes to you and your family and good wishes to a strong recovery and hope that things are better long-term.

    Reply
  17. Erin Hance says

    September 19, 2016 at 1:47 pm

    My heart aches for you Jamie!!!
    This is my biggest fear, as I have two rescue dogs that I am hopelessly obsessed with.
    I can’t begin to understand the helpless feeling your having now, it has to be so overwhelming! 🙁
    Please know that you, Finn and your family are in my thoughts.
    I’m sending positive vibes, prayers and love your way…
    (((HUGS)))

    Reply
  18. Morgan @ Gone with the Words says

    September 19, 2016 at 1:54 pm

    I’m so sorry you and Will are going through this, and I feel awful for Finn. Really hoping they can find a long term solution, but I’m glad he’s resting at home with you in the meantime <3 Sending love and hugs.

    Reply
  19. Trina @ Between Chapters says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:03 pm

    Poor thing. Sending y’all good thoughts! Hoping for good news at his next check up. <3

    Reply
  20. Brittany @ The Book Addict's Guide says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:07 pm

    I’m so sorry, Jamie!!! I’ve been trying to keep up with the Finn news — this poor sweet pup! I hope you guys get good news with the next tests! <333 And if it's something that he has to deal with in his life, hopefully it's something that they can manage. Xoxox

    Reply
  21. Laura @ Scribbles & Wanderlust says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:13 pm

    Thank you for this update Jamie, even though you didn’t NEED to. I’m so sorry this happened but I’m THRILLED he is on the mend. Take it one day at a time. You, Will, and Finn are in my thoughts and prayers. I have no doubt Finn feels like the luckiest pup to have such loving parents.

    Reply
  22. Becky @ A Fool's Ingenuity says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:23 pm

    I saw you post about this on Instagram and wanted to say something so I’m glad to see it here so I can write a super long comment for you.

    There is absolutely nothing worse than your dog getting sick because they can’t say anything to you about if they’re in pain or if it just looks a lot worse than it is so I’m sorry you’ve had to go through all this. I know what a nightmare it can be when your dog gets ill because our last dog did and it was heartbreaking seeing him whenever he went to the vets. I always felt like I wanted to do more to help him but couldn’t. You just need to keep him calm and hope he’ll be okay as there is absolutely no point thinking the worst. It’s good they’ve let him come home because vets almost never do that unless they are feeling optimistic that he will be okay at home so I will keep my fingers crossed he’ll slowly recover.

    Reply
  23. Sarah @ Sarah Says Read says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:40 pm

    I’m so sorry Jamie!! I can’t even imagine. I hope you get good news this week and that Finn can get back on track to living a long, healthy life. (((HUGS)))

    Reply
  24. Christina Franke says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:45 pm

    My thoughts are with you guys, Jamie! I hope they get Finn all better for now and for the future. He’s such a sweet, happy guy (I haven’t met him obviously but it’s so clear from photos.) You guys are such great puppy parents, and *HUGS*

    Reply
  25. Rebecca Taylor says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:48 pm

    I don’t usually comment, but I’m so sorry your poor pup is having to go through this. And your family! It’s so frightening when horrible things happen to the animals we love and want to keep safe. Sending positive waves your way.

    Reply
  26. Chrystal says

    September 19, 2016 at 2:53 pm

    Oh Sweetie! I am so sorry to hear this. I am hoping that steroids work.

    Not that it’s the same, but it might be…. a few months before my wedding I developed Immune thrombocytopenic purpura… I had the little red spots all over, extremely low platelets and bled easily. I have a feeling it’s similar from what you’ve described. I had to be put on prednisone and it took a few months but I got better and have been fine since then. This was back in 2012.

    I’m rooting for Finn to pull through this. Be patient and just keep an eye on him. Lots of blood tests were how we tracked whether I was improving or not.

    PS I had never heard of Immune thrombocytopenic purpura until I came down with it. It’s still unknown how I got it or why, but I feel like your little Finn has the doggy version of it.

    *hugs*

    Reply
  27. Michelle @ In Libris Veritas says

    September 19, 2016 at 3:03 pm

    I am so sorry. I really hope the vet can find a solution to help get Finn back on the road to being healthy. We had a scare with our cat a few months ago, and it’s truly terrifying to wake up one day and see them sick. I really wish him and you all the best.

    Reply
  28. Kayla @ Tiny Bookshelves says

    September 19, 2016 at 3:33 pm

    Oh my gosh, I’m so so sorry to hear this. I understand completely how heartbreaking and impossible these situations are, having had dogs all of my life. There is nothing worse than when your puppy is sick and you can’t do anything to help 🙁 thinking all the best thoughts and sending well wishes for Finn!

    Reply
  29. Brandie says

    September 19, 2016 at 4:36 pm

    Oh Jamie, I am so very sorry you’re going through this with your sweet dog! I hope he pulls through it all and responds to the treatments. Lots of prayers and good vibes coming your way.

    Reply
  30. kristen says

    September 19, 2016 at 4:48 pm

    oh Jamie. your poor baby. i am so, so, so sorry. sending all my good thoughts and vibes your way, i hope he recovers and stays with you for many more adoption anniversaries. poor pup.

    Reply
  31. Pili @ In Love With Handmade says

    September 19, 2016 at 6:46 pm

    Oh dear, I do hope he responds to the treatment so his platelets will be much better this coming Thursday!
    I’m sending all my best wishes, vibes and loads of love for you guys and Finn! ALL THE HUGS!!

    Reply
  32. Kailana says

    September 19, 2016 at 10:26 pm

    Poor pup! Poor you! I am kind of obsessed with my dog, so I can totally relate to how you must be feeling in the sense that I would be a mess if something similar happened to my dog. Thinking lots of great thoughts that it all goes well!

    Reply
  33. Gabby says

    September 20, 2016 at 12:36 am

    Thinking good thoughts for your poor pup! I can’t even imagine how you must be feeling…we adopted ours nine months ago and my heart would just break into a million pieces if I was going through the same thing. Hoping for the best for you and your little guy!

    Reply
  34. Hannah @ Broc's Bookcase says

    September 20, 2016 at 5:20 am

    It’s always so horrible to see our pets in such a horrible situation and not be able to explain to them whats happening to them. Sending good thoughts to you and little Finn, I hope he responds well to his treatment and is able to go back to his usual hyper self soon x

    Reply
  35. Kyra Morris says

    September 20, 2016 at 5:42 am

    Oh Jamie, I’m so, so sorry to hear this! It’s the worst when we have to see our pets suffer. I’m so sorry that you, Will and Finn have had to go through this. I hope Thursday’s results are good! <3 Sending you guys lots of love and biiiig hugs! <3

    Reply
  36. Jolien @ The Fictional Reader says

    September 20, 2016 at 7:13 am

    I’m so sorry this is happening! I hope Finn will be okay soon, and that the results will bring you good news!

    Reply
  37. Jordon @ Simply Adrift says

    September 20, 2016 at 7:19 am

    Omg I’m so sorry this is happening! Poor doggy, I really hope he gets better and all ends up being well. He looks so adorable!

    Reply
  38. Nina says

    September 20, 2016 at 8:07 am

    Hey Jamie, I was deeply saddened to hear about the ordeal you guys and especially your dog are going through. The book community is also here for sharing life events, like this one, to have people reach out to you. I hope your dog – room mate, friend, and furry companion – will be alright! He’s a cutie!

    Reply
  39. Sara says

    September 20, 2016 at 8:25 am

    I’m so sorry :(. Finn is an amazing dog and I love seeing your updates about him. I adopted a dog shortly after so I feel like we are on the journey of dog ownership together. I’m giving you all the support I can from Canada ❤️. He’s a trooper and so are you and will.

    Reply
  40. Brittany says

    September 20, 2016 at 8:47 am

    Oh, I’m am so, so sorry! I will pray for your poor, sweet fur-baby, and I hope he starts to feel better soon!

    Reply
  41. Stormy @ Book.Blog.Bake. says

    September 20, 2016 at 8:56 am

    Oh, poor boy! That last picture makes me want to reach through the internet & give Finn a big hug. I think I saw one of your updates on twitter but hadn’t realized what was going on. Hoping for good news on Thursday!

    Reply
  42. Megan B says

    September 20, 2016 at 9:16 am

    I am sorry to hear the news about your doggie. Our pets are the best ans I cant imagine life without them. I will keep your dog, Will, and yourself in my thoughts. I hope Thursdays results go well. Sending lots of love! <3

    Reply
  43. chelsea jacobs says

    September 20, 2016 at 10:01 am

    I am so sorry!! That is the absolute worst, you just want to be able to talk to them and tell them it will all be okay! Thinking of you and hoping you get good news from the tests!

    Reply
  44. Grace says

    September 20, 2016 at 10:47 am

    Hi Jamie, Sending you all the positive thoughts and prayers I can for Thursday’s appt. I’ve been going through something similar with my own pup recently and it’s the worst, so I can totally relate to the constant stream of tears, so I am hoping for some good news soon, too. Hugs to you and your sweet Finn!

    Reply
  45. Leandra Wallace says

    September 20, 2016 at 10:58 am

    Glad he’s home now! I’m sure being there will help in his mending too. Sending good thoughts that this will clear up (and be manageable for you & him) and he’ll soon be the normal Finn.

    Reply
  46. Alexa S. says

    September 20, 2016 at 11:46 am

    Poor Finn! Thinking of you, Will and Finn and praying for his recovery <3

    Reply
  47. Jessica @ a GREAT read says

    September 20, 2016 at 4:32 pm

    Aww!! Poor Finn! I will keep in my thoughts and prayers!

    Reply
  48. Sabrina says

    September 21, 2016 at 2:17 pm

    Best of luck to you! I hope he will make a speedy recovery.

    Reply
  49. Aubrey @ Aubrey's Book Nook says

    September 21, 2016 at 5:21 pm

    Oh my goodness. I am so sorry. I really hope he gets better! Take as much time as you need and never feel bad about it.

    Reply
  50. Ksenia @ Something Delicate says

    September 22, 2016 at 2:18 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear about Finn, Jamie. You made it clear that Finn is a family member and how much he means to you. My heart goes out to you all. Hoping for the best.

    Reply
  51. Michelle says

    September 22, 2016 at 5:37 pm

    I don’t think Finn or Will or you have been out of my thoughts since I first talked to you about what was going on, and I will keep thinking of you until he is completely out of the woods!

    Reply
    • Jamie says

      September 23, 2016 at 9:40 am

      You are too sweet <333 I really appreciate it. Idk if you saw the news on Twitter but his appointment went real well and his platelets are up! Not to normal levels but he's out of the "could spontaneously bleed at the slightest thing" level! So I'm feeling pretty positive!!

      Reply
  52. Jackie Lea Sommers says

    September 23, 2016 at 11:42 am

    We love you, Finnikin! Feel better, buddy! You too, Jamie! <3

    Reply
  53. Kristie W. says

    September 26, 2016 at 3:57 pm

    I am catching up on posts in my email and saw this one. Oh how scary for you, Will, and Finn!! I am glad to see in a comment above that he is doing better. I would be one to cry buckets too, hate when my pup doesn’t feel well and especially when it’s super scary. I hope the doctors can find a cause and a way to keep Finn healthy.

    Reply
  54. Emily Seals says

    September 26, 2016 at 8:14 pm

    Dog injuries are some of the toughest things to go through. I’m sorry this has happened to you guys. I hope he feels better soon, and I’m sending you my thoughts and prayers along the way.

    Reply
  55. Zeee @ I Heart Romance & YA says

    October 4, 2016 at 11:19 am

    I’m sorry to hear Finn is not out of the woods yet, Jaime! I know I saw a tweet when you guys first caught this! I’m also happy that he is doing better. Still, I understand how scary this is for you. *hugs*

    Reply

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Friends don’t let friends be without a good book. Let’s be friends?
Elder millennial. Cries a lot, always down a rabbit hole.
Blogger since 2010👇

A book recommendation for all my historical fictio A book recommendation for all my historical fiction readers - The Briar Club by Kate Quinn. My holy grail historical author came through for me again. I can’t express how much I cared for and was pulled into the lives of these women living in a boardinghouse in DC during the McCarthy era just as much as I was racing to find out what happened in this house. The tension mounted as we got to what actually happened?? Masterful. Truly. #historicalfiction #bookrec #bookrecommendation #historicalfictionbooks @williammorrowbooks
Made a fun family day out of Independent Bookstore Made a fun family day out of Independent Bookstore Day and hit up new faves @maveybooks and what used to be my second home when I lived closer @childrensbookworld which was so nice to be back home 🥹🥹

Book shopping is great but I can’t express how incredible building community is and indie bookshops do just that. I always wanted my own version of Cheers and, while not a bar where everybody knows my name, CBW was that place for me for almost a decade when I built community by going to YA book events there and moderating events. And while I am not able to get there as often as I was before I became a mom and we moved further away, It’s been so special to be able to share this beloved space with Riley.

These indie bookshops are so vital to our communities and I know everyone’s situation is different so this isn’t to shame but That Website can’t replace what can be created in these book spaces. Shop local when you are able! #indiebookshop #bookshop #bookshopping #independentbookstore
Ok technically I’m lying. My last read was technic Ok technically I’m lying. My last read was technically ATMOSPHERE but I feel like between my stories and my dedicated post to it, I’d rather talk about the book I read before it but didn’t update y’all on.

The Trouble With Anna — I enjoyed this delightful little historical romance about a heroine who is carving out her independence only to find out, when her grandfather dies, that he tied her inheritance/future to marrying her best friend’s brother — a not-so-happy surprise for both of them. I could understand why they both had some guardness/walls up and I enjoyed watching them slowly start to lower them.

Mayhem and the Mortal - I’m not too far into this romantic fantasy but it is one of my most anticipated that came out last month and I’m excited to dig in more.

Hamnet — I know, I know. For April I decided not to make a traditional TBR list of books I wanted to read but instead give myself some prompts to guide my reading (bc I’m overwhelmed with all my choices at hand) without feeling rigid. One of the prompts was to read a book I HAD TO BUY but is still unread. So going to finally get to it. Have you read this one or watched the movie?

What are you currently reading?
I had been waiting for the perfect time to read th I had been waiting for the perfect time to read this one after Random House sent me a finished copy as TJR is a longtime auto-buy author.  I found myself caught up in all the space joy and wonder and feeling quite parasocial about the Artemis crew...I decided now was the time.

I had no idea what I was getting into.

I hadn’t really known what it was about but I didn’t really need to given its TJR & the fact it was 1980s NASA & astronauts.

But this book was about love to me - romantic love, platonic love, familial love, love for something bigger than yourself, love for the person you are & are becoming, love in the face of obstacles, love for what lights you up.

Having been invested in real life astronauts & their journey lately really made this book even more vivid to me — seeing the bonds of the crew so deeply, feeling the fragility that exists while they are doing this wondrous & crazy thing that often still boggles my mind that we can do.

And, hardest to put into words, that feeling of awe in the expansive nature & capabilities of love & the universe that I felt when a husband named a crater after his late wife which doubly helped me understand how Joan & Vanessa felt looking back at earth.

It made me sob & feel everything about being a human so deeply basically from that Frances/Joan phone call at 86% of the way through until the final words. Like could not breathe.

*might be a tiny bit spoilery so beware:

I think the way she wrote this was so impactful bc we start out knowing something bad happens &it’s not even that far when we know that some of them def won’t make it back & some are alive in peril.

I was like “oof” when *it* happens early on. But each and every chapter where we learn more about these ppl & their relationships felt agonizing & I was retroactively grieving for them more deeply every turn of the page.

The hurt and grief just compounds from a moment that was sad from the jump to something that had dug in deep to me.

To know what happens right before this mission makes the mission control bits even more excruciating. Makes the peril a character is in hit even harder than just “oh that must be scary!”. 

I loved it. I needed it bad.
The theme of Q1 was “just go with it” — it being m The theme of Q1 was “just go with it” — it being my reading whims, quirks and troubles.

Interesting things:

1. January started out rough. I only read 1 physical book and leaned very heavy into audiobooks only. At first it was distressing that my brain -thanks to current events and their effect on my mind - couldn’t work out how to sit down and read with my eyeballs but I was like…let’s just roll with it and wait for it to pass. So I waited and enjoyed a ton of audiobooks.

2. I don’t think I’ve ever read so many thrillers and mysteries in a quarter. It’s a genre I love but I’m normally quite more balanced. However, it’s what I was craving and what my brain was tolerating so…I just went with it.

3. I have always been a reader led by my moods (both how I feel reading wise and personally). This quarter was FERAL. Like the most feral mood reading ever. I couldn’t even categorize it. I’d decide on one book enthusiastically and suddenly I was like…absolutely not that.

4. I read way less fantasy than normal which was WEIRD but I felt like I also wasn’t surprised given my brain space.

5. I really started to resent people even more who said “it’s a book account stop talking about politics etc”. Babe, I’m a human who gives a shit but ALSO this has and always been an account of MY reading life. And my reading life was profoundly affected by the things that were going on in this country. Like they have been before - whether it’s been current events or things like having a kid, being depressed, slumps, etc.

6. I return to the fact that, for me, I am happiest when I pay attention to my reading whims. The end of the month I had a very specific reading mood (wanted time travel element but not a heavy time travel book) and I decided to pick up A Rip Through Time at the end of the month and I’m now halfway through book 4. Having the best time ever!!! 

Anyways, tell me how your reading life was in Q1! Fave books? Biggest surprises??
New historical fiction books on my radar for April New historical fiction books on my radar for April and I feel like there is quite a bit of variety. Any of these on your TBR? #historicalfictionbooks #historicalfiction #newbookrelease #newbookreleases
Being someone who reads based on their ever shifti Being someone who reads based on their ever shifting reading moods (sometimes very feral) makes library holds and tbrs very hard. It’s the worst when 5 weeks ago I would have gobbled the library hold up but now when the hold comes in I’m like…I think not. #readersofinstagram #readerproblems #librarylife #librarybooks #moodreader
I love when I just absolutely nail it on the first I love when I just absolutely nail it on the first try when trying to satisfy a super specific reading mood - Kelley Armstrong’s A Rip Through Time definitely nailed what I wanted. Time travel but didn’t really want too time travely…just more of a vibe or catalyst for some fun. If you love a good mystery, some time travel shenanigans and a great cast of characters, I highly recommend this book. #bookrec #bookrecommendation #bookreview #mysterybooks #historicalmystery #kelleyarmstrong
🌸 Some romances on my personal radar for April. 🌸 🌸 Some romances on my personal radar for April. 🌸

Beyond excited for a new Kate Clayborn, Kasie west, rainbow Rowell, Jenn Bennett and Beth O’Leary - I’ve enjoyed these authors in the past.

My historical loving heart is most excited for The Duke and How To Fake It In Society.

I love an emotional romance so The Art of Loving You is high on my list plus I’ve heard great things about this author.

I’m intrigued by Fast Lane especially since it’s being adapted for a tv series. I’m seeing comparisons to Elle Kennedy’s Off Campus series which I did love!

Which new romance books are piquing your interest or are on your TBR? #romancebooks #newbooks #romancebooktok #romancereader
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Jamie is a 32 year old married lady (with a new baby!!) who is in denial that she's actually that old to be a married lady and a mom. When she's not reading you can find her doing Pilates followed by eating ice cream, belting out Hamilton (loud and offkey) and having adventures with her husband, daughter and rescue dog.

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A book recommendation for all my historical fictio A book recommendation for all my historical fiction readers - The Briar Club by Kate Quinn. My holy grail historical author came through for me again. I can’t express how much I cared for and was pulled into the lives of these women living in a boardinghouse in DC during the McCarthy era just as much as I was racing to find out what happened in this house. The tension mounted as we got to what actually happened?? Masterful. Truly. #historicalfiction #bookrec #bookrecommendation #historicalfictionbooks @williammorrowbooks
Made a fun family day out of Independent Bookstore Made a fun family day out of Independent Bookstore Day and hit up new faves @maveybooks and what used to be my second home when I lived closer @childrensbookworld which was so nice to be back home 🥹🥹

Book shopping is great but I can’t express how incredible building community is and indie bookshops do just that. I always wanted my own version of Cheers and, while not a bar where everybody knows my name, CBW was that place for me for almost a decade when I built community by going to YA book events there and moderating events. And while I am not able to get there as often as I was before I became a mom and we moved further away, It’s been so special to be able to share this beloved space with Riley.

These indie bookshops are so vital to our communities and I know everyone’s situation is different so this isn’t to shame but That Website can’t replace what can be created in these book spaces. Shop local when you are able! #indiebookshop #bookshop #bookshopping #independentbookstore
Ok technically I’m lying. My last read was technic Ok technically I’m lying. My last read was technically ATMOSPHERE but I feel like between my stories and my dedicated post to it, I’d rather talk about the book I read before it but didn’t update y’all on.

The Trouble With Anna — I enjoyed this delightful little historical romance about a heroine who is carving out her independence only to find out, when her grandfather dies, that he tied her inheritance/future to marrying her best friend’s brother — a not-so-happy surprise for both of them. I could understand why they both had some guardness/walls up and I enjoyed watching them slowly start to lower them.

Mayhem and the Mortal - I’m not too far into this romantic fantasy but it is one of my most anticipated that came out last month and I’m excited to dig in more.

Hamnet — I know, I know. For April I decided not to make a traditional TBR list of books I wanted to read but instead give myself some prompts to guide my reading (bc I’m overwhelmed with all my choices at hand) without feeling rigid. One of the prompts was to read a book I HAD TO BUY but is still unread. So going to finally get to it. Have you read this one or watched the movie?

What are you currently reading?
I had been waiting for the perfect time to read th I had been waiting for the perfect time to read this one after Random House sent me a finished copy as TJR is a longtime auto-buy author.  I found myself caught up in all the space joy and wonder and feeling quite parasocial about the Artemis crew...I decided now was the time.

I had no idea what I was getting into.

I hadn’t really known what it was about but I didn’t really need to given its TJR & the fact it was 1980s NASA & astronauts.

But this book was about love to me - romantic love, platonic love, familial love, love for something bigger than yourself, love for the person you are & are becoming, love in the face of obstacles, love for what lights you up.

Having been invested in real life astronauts & their journey lately really made this book even more vivid to me — seeing the bonds of the crew so deeply, feeling the fragility that exists while they are doing this wondrous & crazy thing that often still boggles my mind that we can do.

And, hardest to put into words, that feeling of awe in the expansive nature & capabilities of love & the universe that I felt when a husband named a crater after his late wife which doubly helped me understand how Joan & Vanessa felt looking back at earth.

It made me sob & feel everything about being a human so deeply basically from that Frances/Joan phone call at 86% of the way through until the final words. Like could not breathe.

*might be a tiny bit spoilery so beware:

I think the way she wrote this was so impactful bc we start out knowing something bad happens &it’s not even that far when we know that some of them def won’t make it back & some are alive in peril.

I was like “oof” when *it* happens early on. But each and every chapter where we learn more about these ppl & their relationships felt agonizing & I was retroactively grieving for them more deeply every turn of the page.

The hurt and grief just compounds from a moment that was sad from the jump to something that had dug in deep to me.

To know what happens right before this mission makes the mission control bits even more excruciating. Makes the peril a character is in hit even harder than just “oh that must be scary!”. 

I loved it. I needed it bad.
The theme of Q1 was “just go with it” — it being m The theme of Q1 was “just go with it” — it being my reading whims, quirks and troubles.

Interesting things:

1. January started out rough. I only read 1 physical book and leaned very heavy into audiobooks only. At first it was distressing that my brain -thanks to current events and their effect on my mind - couldn’t work out how to sit down and read with my eyeballs but I was like…let’s just roll with it and wait for it to pass. So I waited and enjoyed a ton of audiobooks.

2. I don’t think I’ve ever read so many thrillers and mysteries in a quarter. It’s a genre I love but I’m normally quite more balanced. However, it’s what I was craving and what my brain was tolerating so…I just went with it.

3. I have always been a reader led by my moods (both how I feel reading wise and personally). This quarter was FERAL. Like the most feral mood reading ever. I couldn’t even categorize it. I’d decide on one book enthusiastically and suddenly I was like…absolutely not that.

4. I read way less fantasy than normal which was WEIRD but I felt like I also wasn’t surprised given my brain space.

5. I really started to resent people even more who said “it’s a book account stop talking about politics etc”. Babe, I’m a human who gives a shit but ALSO this has and always been an account of MY reading life. And my reading life was profoundly affected by the things that were going on in this country. Like they have been before - whether it’s been current events or things like having a kid, being depressed, slumps, etc.

6. I return to the fact that, for me, I am happiest when I pay attention to my reading whims. The end of the month I had a very specific reading mood (wanted time travel element but not a heavy time travel book) and I decided to pick up A Rip Through Time at the end of the month and I’m now halfway through book 4. Having the best time ever!!! 

Anyways, tell me how your reading life was in Q1! Fave books? Biggest surprises??
New historical fiction books on my radar for April New historical fiction books on my radar for April and I feel like there is quite a bit of variety. Any of these on your TBR? #historicalfictionbooks #historicalfiction #newbookrelease #newbookreleases
Being someone who reads based on their ever shifti Being someone who reads based on their ever shifting reading moods (sometimes very feral) makes library holds and tbrs very hard. It’s the worst when 5 weeks ago I would have gobbled the library hold up but now when the hold comes in I’m like…I think not. #readersofinstagram #readerproblems #librarylife #librarybooks #moodreader

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